inferiority monster

i never wanted to be me
fuckin damn shit ugly loser
ugly ugly ugly ugly u g l y
im a loser baby so why don't you kill me?

sadistically disturbing again

gift from my sadistic star = pain

the one cant be loved by da one who the one love all the time
the one cant love da one who loves the one all the time

again and again and again and again

no one cant decide the one who fall in love with

crashed like a bug in the ground (let down)

am tired

とにかく悲痛だってこと。

dizzy / coma

recognizing the moment
of the slide into
the moment entering

a s t r a l p r o j e c t i o n ?

sound... far away
what this some like filters between ear and sound?

don't understand what i am seeing
but i recognize clearly
substances, space, and colors are incidenting into my sight

walking? moving?
such senses... whats that?
disappeared

like walking moving flying in dreams
recognizing it but not feeling it

then. different strange part of the sense becomes very sharp
sharpness only at the moment
i rather love that

space i can meet only in a coma
sound i can hear only in a coma
sharpness i can get only in a coma

experience of an anaemic person

昏睡状態のシャープな視覚がわりと好きなんだ。

fantasy

fantasy... is

not real and probably will never be ???

no
rather truth
the beautiful one

do you understand?

moratorium

moratorium

a childish young person who does not want to grow up